[tsat home] [#32] [columns]
Random
Access
So Anyway, This God Walks Into a Bar...
by The Phantom Websurfer
©2004 Bard and Cubist -- all rights reserved

Ever notice how some of the most ostensibly religious and devout Christians around, don't seem to have a whole lot of fun? Kind of strange, really. We are, after all, talking about a God Who not only saw fit to create the duckbilled platypus, but also went so far as to slip jokes into His unauthorized autobiography! And yet, even with these irrefutable evidences that He's got a finely tuned sense of humor, some of His followers just don't get it. Case in point: Jack T. Chick, creator and publisher of hundreds of palm-sized illustrated tracts devoted to the eternal tortures God has in store for all those heathens who don't hate everything Chick hates -- and it's a long list, including homosexuals, Catholics, the theory of evolution, roleplaying games, you name it.

In a nutshell: This Chick guy is asking to be deflated. Fortunately, there is no shortage of people who are willing to deflate him -- and some of the results can be seen at the Random Access links for this issue.


Somebody Set Us Up the Bible!

What does the media virus known as 'All your base are belong to us' have to do with fundamentalist Christianity? Well... nothing, really. Strangely, this complete and utter lack of logical connection didn't stop some anonymous person from splicing the 'All your base' dialogue into a choice collection of Chick-ly panels... an act of cultural miscgenation whose end product does have a certain compelling quality to it. Of course, exactly the same thing could be said of a car wreck at the side of the road...

Go here to be amused, informed, and edified.


Your Afterlife, And Welcome To It

Christianity isn't the only belief system which is concerned with the quality of one's post-mortem existence. However, some belief systems do not lend themselves to Chick-style evangelism as readily as others. For some, like Judaism, the whole 'evangelism' schtick just isn't their bag; for others, such as Buddhism, the ultimate rewards are a bit too philosophical to fit into a sound bite. But these religions do offer their adherents some measure of solace, an end to suffering at the very least. What is a would-be evangelist to do with a belief system which offers no benefits whatsoever -- a belief system in which one is damned, inescapably damned, and the best one can hope for is to go mad quickly so that you no longer care that you're being tormented unjustly? Howard Hallis knows. He's put together a Chick-style tract to promote the worship of H.P. Lovecraft's Great Old Ones. And he's got a rather persuasive argument on his side!

You owe it to yourself to find out: Who Will Be Eaten First?

Later addendum: Due to threat of legal action over the alleged misuse of Jack Chick's art, the original WWBEF? is offline -- but a new, wholly re-drawn version, immune to such threats, is here.


If you know of any sites whose subject matter renders them suitable for inclusion in TSAT, send us the URL!


[tsat home] [#32] [columns]