At some point Gary left my side. The shakes were under control but I wasn't feeling well. I was sitting on a small stack of phone directories. They still made them in limited supply for folks who couldn't use or didn't have in-house State Comp-Nets.

My clothes were very uncomfortable I had to pee and the bathrooms were locked. I couldn't just go outside and hang it over the rail now. Life had gotten a lot more complicated in the last half an hour or so. I was miserable.

The others were standing in a group talking about leaving. I had to fix some things before I could consider leaving. I needed clothes that fit. I had to get back on Rod's good side and get him to open one of the bathrooms so I could pee. Moreover, I had to figure out where I was going to go for the next two days when I left here.

I was beginning to become resolved to the idea that I was going to be female for a while. If I didn't think on the problem too hard, I could just bear it. I could go from one minute to the next and tell myself, "See, you're still OK." Then the next minute, "See, you're still OK. And when the next minute comes you'll still be OK." That gave me some strength to go to the next time interval, because the next minute was going to come whether I wanted it to or not. The only question for me was, was I going to get to it with my sanity intact or not.

Some of the others had dressed in clothing that they had not been wearing when we arrived. I remembered seeing clothing on movable racks on the way in, girls underwear pants, shoes, and other stuff, tucked away in the cubbies created by the stacks of boxes around the warehouse. That's were they must have come up their clothes. That meant that perhaps I could find some jeans and a T-shirt that would fit me.

I spoke up. "Ahem," I said to get everyone's attention, but I was surprised at how dainty it sounded. "I don't want to be any trouble, but I really didn't anticipate this kind of an evening."

They all turned to me as I continued, "So if anyone can offer a solution to the problem of my clothing, and if someone could figure out how to open one of those bathrooms back there I'd be very appreciative." I tried to keep my tone very respectful. It made me feel sick to kowtow to these guys but like I said, I didn't know how much else had changed and I was in no position to find out.

"How appreciative, babe?" It was Rod. I guess he just couldn't help himself.

Frank backhanded him on the shoulder and pointed a finger in his face with a look that said "Remember what Gary said asshole!"

Smack!

"Heeeyyyy, That hurt!" and Frank offered me a little grin. I winked back.

The rest of them looked at my plight for the first time as a problem and not as a spectacle. My clothes didn't fit me any more. My jeans were rolled up as far as they would go and still it wasn't enough to let my feet out the ends, so I had bunched them around the knees. We've already discussed the problem my shirt presented. The guys didn't know it, or need to either, but my underwear was... well, I guess you could say my panties were in a wad. They were bunched up in places making hard tight little balls of cotton that made it very uncomfortable to sit down or walk. I needed underwear meant for this body.

Gary came around the corner with several items of clothing hanging on his arm. I was vaguely aware that he'd gone, but wasn't sure what he had been doing. Now I could see that he was practicing being a gentleman. He bowed and handed the stack of clothes to me.

"These look like they'll fit. I believe they'll temporarily solve some of your garment problems, though I have to admit, I don't know much about women's sizes."

I took items and inspected them, one skirt, two panties, a bra, a sweater and a jacket.

"And I do?" I asked. I was more than a little hesitant about wearing a skirt and panties. "No pants huh? That's about right for the way my luck is running tonight," I said sarcastically. I think Gary knew I was grateful for the effort.

"We had already gotten our clothes before you came out. After the excitement had died down, I noticed that your old clothes didn't fit so well. Hell, this place has little bit of everything."

"I'm not sure I can wear this stuff," I said holding up one of the skirts.

"Well you can go look for something else but I can tell you, I looked and didn't see anything else. You'll have to look fast though; we can't stay long."

I must have been making a face as I held up the panties in front of my face to inspect them. They were lacy, frilly little things made of satin. I just couldn't reconcile myself to the idea that these were going to go on my body!

"Look," Gary continued. "From where I'm sitting I don't think you have choice. You'd look even sillier wearing guy's clothing. You'll have to make due until we can get these skins off."

I sighed and I looked up at him hopefully and asked, "Did you happen to see any boxes marked shoes?"

"I don't think so, why?"

I looked down at my tiny feet that were parked next to my enormous shoes and looked back up again.

"Oh, they're kinda small aren't they?"

"Yeah. I stepped right out of them on my way out here. They didn't even follow me one step. I can't wear these." I dumped the shoes I had been holding under my arm on the floor. Down there, next to my feet they looked huge.

I slipped my feet into them. "Ringling Brothers and Barnum and Bailey Circus presents, Clown Girl! Tada!" I held out my arms and gave a little curtsy.

I tried to smile, but I could feel my face break apart. No matter how I tried to make light of the situation, I just wound up thinking how stuck I had become and I got scared I sat back down and cradled my head in my hands and let my eyes leak just a little bit.

I was still in shock; I could see that I was now female, but my mind hadn't resolved the issue yet and it didn't seem likely that it would. Little reminders of what I had become were all around me. The weight on my chest, my size, my voice, the noticeable lack of flesh between my legs and the long hair all served to remind me that I was a radically different person than I had been when I arrived here. I felt off center when I walked. I had a slightly higher center of gravity than I had when I was male. My skin was softer and more delicate that it had been earlier today.

Compounded with the fact that it had taken less than a minute to completely wipe out the person I had been didn't do much to help the adjustment period.

Gary saw I was becoming upset. He knelt down in front of me on one knee as I sat on the phone books.

"Look, I'm sorry!"

"For what?" I sniffed, and wiped my eyes. "You and Frank and Kit, you all helped me when Rod jumped on me, and I thank you -- even if it was a bit embarrassing to have my ass almost kicked by that half-wit. It's good to know who your friends are."

"No, that's not what I'm talking about. I'm sorry I got you into this mess. Hell, it never even occurred to me that there might be female skins in that box. This was just dumb! You're my best friend." He reached down and took my hand. I don't think he knew he was doing it. My eyes opened with surprise as I watched him take it and gently hold it in both of his.

"I never wanted to hurt you. I should have listened to you just this once. I'm really sorry man!" He looked like he was going to cry now.

I started to giggle.

"What?"

I started to laugh!

"What?"

The laughter was coming in gales now.

"What? What? What?"

"It's just... it's just..." I couldn't get it out. I was laughing hysterically.

Everyone else came around to see what I was laughing about. They were thunderstruck. There was Gary, down on one knee in front of a beautiful young girl, badly dressed though she was, and holding her hand. I could almost see it from their perspective.

"Oh shit, I'm gonna pee!" I fell sideways off the stack of books. I was really pressing my legs together to prevent myself from pissing in my pants, but I felt I was losing the battle. " Ah ha ha ha ha ha ah!"

"Oops, we seem to have interrupted a tender moment," Frank offered. This got Gary's attention.

"Huh?"

"What's wrong, she turn you down dude?" It was Norman, I'd almost forgotten about him.

With that, I lost the Battle of the Bladder. "Ok damn it, I peed. Yuck!" I croaked through the laughter. I could feel the large warm spot spreading in my jeans. It was gross, but I couldn't help it. I just couldn't stop laughing or peeing.

"Huh?" Gary said again, obviously still confused. He looked around saw he was kneeling where I'd been sitting and flushed when he realized what the situation must have looked like to the others.

"Ah hell!" he snapped as he got up and waved his hands at the whole mess. Everyone was laughing now. Flustered, Gary stalked off.

Kit walked over to me and looked down where I was lying on my side and said, "You could have let him down easy you know!" and walked off.

"Quit it! Aw God, please just quit it!"

Everybody else was wailing. I was on the floor trying desperately to stop. After some time, I don't know how long, I managed to get myself under control.

No question about it now, I was going to have change clothes. My pants were ruined. My shorts were ruined as well. I got up and hobbled bowlegged to the back of the warehouse.

I passed Frank as I made my way to the back of the warehouse to change, "Damn girl, you're a mess," he said as I passed. I turned around and flipped him off. That set them all to laughing again.

I managed to strip off the jeans and shorts, but I left the shirt on for the time being. I still remembered the feeling of Rod trying to get a peek at my... tits! I didn't want to be too naked if one of them tried it again. I was embarrassed to be seen in this body and it was really scary.

In the corner was a small sink for shop cleanup. I found some paper towels and washed up to some extent. I tried to avoid my genital area. Touching that it seemed would just make it all seem too real, but I stunk of urine, I couldn't walk around like that. Therefore, I put some soap on a wet paper towel and started to wash up. I spread the soap up the inside of my thighs and moved to my crotch. I lathered there as I was used to doing.

I realized too late that soap can easily get inside your body when you're a girl. You know something? It doesn't feel good.

New Girl Lesson #1: Take care not to wash the vaginal area too aggressively with soap. Soap burns.

I stood with my legs as far apart as I could get them and still stand, fanning myself and splashing water on my crotch, sucking air in short little sucks until the burning started to fade.

Clean, and with the pain a fading memory, I tried on the panties. I ran my hand down the front. They were silky and tight and I felt just a bit more than uncomfortable about wearing them, but at least I was covered. That made me feel a little better.

I picked up the skirt; it was a red plaid pleated thing. Some of the girls in the private schools wear something similar as part of their uniforms, but this was much brighter and more colorful. I stepped into the skirt, pulled it up to my waist, zipped it up in back and took a look. It fit perfectly.

"Ok, I guess this shirt has got to go." I stripped off the shirt. Once again, I was amazed at these things on me. "How do girls live their whole life with these in the way?" I reached up and held them from underneath. "Man, what I would give to have these on someone else I knew." The thought made me sad. They were stuck on me though and that sobering thought got me moving again.

I picked up the bra and placed my arms in the shoulder straps. I moved the cups over my breasts and tried to attach the clips in the back -- and I tried, and I tried, and I tried.

" Ohhh!" I huffed. "Gary can you help me please?"

"Oh Gary, can you help me please, I got this itch," I could hear Kit, at least I thought I was Kit, call out in a mock imitation of woman's voice.

"Very funny," I shouted out and they all cackled.

I was just turning around holding the bra in place with my hands when I bumped, head first into Gary's chest.

"Oops! Say, where the hell were you? You got here awfully fast. You weren't peeking were you?" There it was again, that modesty thing about this body was getting disturbing. What the hell did I care if Gary saw this body, in a couple of days it would be so much spent ash. The answer my mind supplied surprised me. " Because you're a girl and he's a guy!"

"Just standing guard pal."

I felt ashamed for accusing him. "Oh, uh... thanks."

"Sure, what do ya need?"

"I can't fasten this." I turned around and showed him the clasp. He gently pulled the two halves together and clipped them for me.

I turned around to thank him. "Thanks Ga..." He was gone. The way he disappeared and his Indian good looks made me think of the legend of the Lone Ranger.

"Who was that masked man?" I mocked in the deepest voice I could manage and giggled. From the other side of the boxes where I was dressing came a reply.

"That's not very damn funny, Mike!"

"Oops, Sorry," I grinned a sheepish grin at having been overheard.

The bra was a bit tight, but, since it wasn't too bad, I supposed I could use it for the duration. If I didn't get any better at that clasp, I would be just as stuck in the bra as I was this body. Using it for the duration wouldn't be an issue.

I pulled the sweater over me and shrugged into a jacket as well. Then, I cautiously stepped out -- and was greeted by whistles and catcalls. It made me feel very self-conscious and I begged them to stop, but then they just started applauding and whistling louder. Again, I realized I had to try to get into the spirit of the thing if I wanted them to stop, so I offered a small curtsy and the hoopla eventually ceased.

Later, Gary walked up to me and said, "You look very nice." Thankfully, he left it that.

I stretched up and squeezed his shoulder. "Thanks bud. I feel real strange in this stuff though -- and no shoes to boot."

He grinned at me and produced a pair of beach sandals, the cheap kind. My mom said they used to be called flip-flops. I took them and put them on. Good thing it was Spring.

"Well gents," Rod called out -- and added "and lady, are we ready to go?"

I scowled a mock scowl at him. He just grinned back a wide Chinese grin. Good, It seemed we seemed to be back on good terms, for now.

"Note to self; Self, remember to kick Rod's ass in forty-seven hours and six minutes."

"Well, this is it then," I said. I was shaking. I didn't want to do this but what choice did I have? I could stay here and go to women's prison for breaking and entering and grand theft skin. By the time the forty-eight hours passed, I'd be so deep into the system it might be months or even years before I could get this thing off. Hell, once the government got its hands on me it just might keep me at Quantico permanently to keep its dirty little secret safe. The only thing I could do was to try to make the best of it.

I grabbed the key card to my dorm room and got my wallet out of my soiled pants pockets. Kit was standing close by and handed me a plastic bag for my soiled clothes as he took another sip of what I saw him drinking earlier

I dumped the jeans into the bag and tied it off. "Thanks. Say, what're ya drinking?

"Vodka, want some?" he handed me the small plastic flask.

"Thanks again!" I took it and measured it. The bottle was more than half full and I took a big draught from it.

It stung going down, a lot more than I remembered vodka ever stinging before in fact.

" Gack, Oh man!" I croaked. "That's rough! You sure that's vodka?" My eyes were watering.

"Yep! You gotta remember, your throat is brand new. You'll get used to it. Keep it, you need it worse than I do."

"You're all gentleman Kit. You may kiss my hand." Having a bit of fun with it, I reach out and presented him with the back of hand.

"Yeah, Yeah, Yeah!" he said and shoved my hand away.

"Ok, don't say I didn't give you a chance!" I snickered as I walked to the door and out, with just one last glance at the warehouse we were leaving.

The exit gate was at the back of the complex so we didn't have to go past the security booth again. Thank God for small miracles. Rod drove us all out and dropped Gary and I off about three blocks away from my dorm building. It was just nearing three am when we got out of the van and started making our way over the dorm building.

Gary and I now had about two and one half hours to figure out where we were going to spend the next two days. The sun would come up by then and we would be introduced to a city that didn't know us. Worse was the fact that it was now minus six young men that were not completely unknown.

I tried not to think too much about how these things. I tried not to think about how the things on my chest shook a little bit with each step or how I could feel the back of the skirt flapping against my ass as I walked along. I did try to remind myself that I had only a few hours to go, just a few more hours.

We had said nothing to each other since being dropped off. "What's it like?" Gary suddenly asked.

"What's what like?" I knew perfectly well what he meant. I was just hopping I could avoid answering.

"Being a girl, dick head!"

"Girls can't be dick heads! You, on the other hand, are being a major dick head."

"Oh, that's nice!"

"Thank you, and how the hell should I know. I've been one now for less than six hours. That's not a whole lot of time to research the subject, not that I intend to do any further research on the subject than I have to. I intend to hide -- and when my penance is done, I'll go to the parole board and beg for leniency."

"You mean you don't feel any different? That's crap; I know you do. Hell, you couldn't even fight that wuss Rod. You had to have felt something. That's all I'm talking about..."

I had stopped walking, I don't know why. Gary stopped, noticing I wasn't beside him any more.

I felt hollow, hurt, scared, angry... I felt a whole bunch of stuff; it was like my brain had been rewired. I was getting too emotionally strung out much too quickly.

"What's wrong?"

This is bad, I thought, "'What's wrong' is what you ask your girlfriend when you see she's posturing over something you've done to upset her. Next I'm supposed to say 'nothing' and then give him the silent treatment rest of the night because there is, in fact, something wrong -- and he's just too pig headed to see it himself.

I really needed to be a man here and tell him what's bothering me. I looked him straight in the eye and said, "Nothing!" Then, I turned and walked on.

Gary caught up to me and grabbed my arm. "No, what's wrong Mike?"

"You really want to know what's wrong? Ok, let's see, question number one, what's it like? Well from my current vantage point, it sucks being a girl. I'm weaker, thanks for pointing that out again back there by the way. I've spent my entire life as a male, and so far, everyone seems to thinks that I can just acclimate myself to this body on demand. Well I can't. Up here," I pointed to my head, "I'm still Mike Vello, but everywhere else Mike has been wiped out and replaced with this," I gestured at my body. "I'm not this, I don't know how to be this and I can't get the fucking thing off." I pulled at my hair ignoring the pain it caused.

I was sobbing again. "Shit! Shit! Shit!" With each 'shit,' I tugged at the hem of my skirt. "It feels so strange between my legs. That's probably the scariest thing. My dick is gone. Gone Gary. My balls too. You just don't get over that easily. I realized back there at the warehouse, when I discovered that the restrooms were locked, that I couldn't just walk outside and whip it out and whiz. I had to have a toilet to sit on; I can't just stop and piss when I want to.

"I'm all confused. I'm way too emotional. I usually don't cry about anything. Now look at me; this has got to be the second or third time tonight I've broken down about something. I know women don't walk around crying all time, so my guess is that I'm just not used to the change yet.

"It's shit like that keeps getting into my head," I paused and we walked on. Then I think I surprised Gary when I suddenly grabbed my breasts and cried, "And, God damn it, won't these things keep still?"

"No really," Gary said a blank, shocked look in his face. "I want you to tell me what's bothering you -- and don't hold back."

I laughed in spite of myself. "Sorry, I'm all screwed up right now. I'll do better, really." I wiped my eyes and tried to straighten up a bit.

I froze dead in my tracks, "Oh no," I whispered. "I live in an all male dorm. I won't be able to get back to my room until this thing is deactivated. I've got no place to go," I looked at Gary pleadingly.

"Hello, I'm home!"

Journal> Detected Second Input Source. Switching To Conference Scripting

"Uh oh." I glanced around for a clock and thought, "What time is it? Six-thirty. Damn it!"

Anybody home? We have to leave soon. The Christmas party starts in one hour!

"I'm back here Gary, getting ready to go." Lie, lie, lie. "Close Journal."

Journal> Journal Closed: 12/20/2081: 6:28 P.M.

Journal> Journal Date 12/21/2081: 9:10 A.M.

Journal> Voice dictation journal editor, open. Proceed!

"Please review last two statements recorded."

I laughed in spite of myself. "Sorry, I'm all screwed up right now. I'll do better, really." I wiped my eyes and tried to straighten up a bit.

I froze dead in my tracks, "Oh no," I whispered. "I live in an all male dorm. I won't be able to get back to my room until this thing is deactivated. I've got no place to go," I looked at Gary pleadingly.

"Good. Great. Commence recording, please."

Journal> Voice dictation journal editor, open. Proceed!

I guess Gary hadn't given much thought to what would happen after we had the skins on, but in all fairness to Gary, he hadn't known about the lock out period so when he'd been planning this, there really had been no need to worry about where to stay. Now that he was being forced to think about it, he looked like I had punched him in the stomach.

"I can't believe I let Rod talk us into putting these fucking things on. We're on the street. Shit! This is just great. You know what? I just love being a fuck up." He turned to me. "No really I do," he confirmed enthusiastically. "It's just so interesting not knowing what I'm going to do next to screw up my life. You can't image how thrilling that is!" When he was done, all he could do was shake his head.

Gary had never said things like that before, at least not to me anyway. He was usually admonishing me for not being spontaneous enough to enjoy life. If the night could have gotten any stranger, I couldn't have foreseen what would make it any stranger than it was at this very moment.

"Gary!" I suddenly had and idea. "You can get into my room." I was inspired. "The guard won't recognize that you don't belong there. He's there to make sure the guys don't try to smuggle in girls or other contraband like that."

"Girls or contraband like that. Um, contraband. Now let me see..."

"Ok, alright, you know what I mean. Anyway, you can go in and open my window. I'll just climb in. Since my room is in the back, no one will see.

"But aren't you contraband?"

The guy next door does it all the time. Shit, he's always bangin' some babe over there. Hell you can hear their heads knocking on the wall all damn night."

"'Bangin' some babe.' You've got quite a mouth on you young lady. So I stay in your room?"

I nodded.

"And you stay in your room?"

"What's wrong with that? We've done that plenty of times."

"Yeah, you were a guy then."

"You aren't afraid of me, are you Tonto?" I asked and winked at him and ran my hand down his arm. He jerked his arm away from my touch and I giggled.

"Shit, don't do that man! No, I'm not afraid. Are you afraid?"

I paused, "Should I be?"

"I don't think so. It just seems weird, that's all."

"Yeah, I know what you mean. Ok it's settled then. If we can get back in to my room, I have a place to hide and you too have a place to go. See? That was a lot easier than it looked." I felt relieved. It was going to be good to have a friend to go through this with.

Then Gary turned to me and asked, "Well, at least you won't have to explain it to the band. Good thing you were out of work this weekend, eh!"

"Yeah, but I bet if I went up dressed like this we'd get a lot more business. I was sayin' the other day that we needed some kind of gimmick for the demo we're cutting this we... Oh shit Gary, I do have to do something with the band this weekend. Nathan got us a chance to record again at 4Shots Records. Damn it! Damn it! What the hell am I gonna do now?"

Desperation was beginning to set in. My hands went to the back of my neck in the vain hope of finding something there that would free me from this nightmare. I started grunting as I tugged at the skin at the back of my neck.

"What the hell are you doing?"

"Getting off this train right now. What does it look like?"

"That won't work Mike. Stop it. You'll hurt yourself. What are you gonna do if that happens?"

"It will be worth it Gary." I stopped for a second to explain it to him. "I worked long and hard for this chance, Gary. Do you know what it means to be asked back for a second demo cut? It almost never happens. This time the president of the label wants to sit in. He liked the first set so much, I've been told, that he sent the demos out to the local broadcast stations. I have to show up tomorrow and I can't do it as a girl. So are you gonna help me or what?"

"Or what," was all he said to me. I was shocked.

"What the hell are you up to Gary Shipley? You know how important this is to me. Why would you want to keep me like this? If you're thinking what I think you're thinking, then you'd better back off!"

"What the hell are you talking about? No wait, why don't you just tell me what I'm thinking Mike. Man, sometimes -- I have to say it -- sometimes I'm ashamed to be seen with you. Sometimes you act as if you're the only one that's having problems. I know you've had a rough time of it and all with your sister dying and your folks turning out to be jerks, but give me a break. You whine and bitch more than anyone I've ever known. You want to really know what I'm thinking, huh?

I nodded my head, yes. I was blushing and I just knew I looked pitiful. I didn't really want to hear what he thought about it but I also didn't want to end up fending completely for myself in all of this either.

"Ok then, here goes. You must have heard that if you damage these things while they're on then they don't come off again, EVER! Right?"

I nodded again. I had forgotten that in my desperate haste to get it off.

"You're cute right now -- no, beautiful -- you're beautiful, but I guess you know that. How would you like to stay beautiful for the rest of your long life Miss Teenaged American Beauty? Huh, would you like that?"

This time I shook my head no.

"Then you'd better think about the long haul Mike. Stop being so self-centered. Leave it alone. You'll get another chance sometime in the future. Life is loaded with second chances, Mike. Anything could have happened to cause you to miss that appointment. Are you going to throw away your entire life trying to fix something that, right now, can't be fixed?" He paused waiting for an answer that didn't come. "Are you crying again?"

I shook my head again, but my eyes were leaking around the edges.

Sniff. "This meant so much to all of us. I'll probably get kicked out of the band for this. SHIT!" I went and sat down on the curb of the street, burying my head in my hands. I could hear Gary walk over and sit down next to me.

"Thih is very futhed up," I moaned.

"What? I couldn't hear you."

I lifted my head so he could hear me. "I said, 'This is fucked up.'"

Gary ignored the statement; instead, he said "How come you didn't say anything about your demos being sent to the broadcasters?"

"I didn't want to jinx us. I figured that if anyone heard one of our songs we'd hear about it from them."

"Oh? Which songs did you cut?"

"'On A Mountain Top' and 'Into Your Heart.'"

"I like 'On A Mountain Top.' That's a good song, Mike."

"Yeah, did you know that Erin wrote that one?"

"No shit. That's cool. Kind of like a tribute to her, right?"

"Yeah I guess. I thought she would have liked it. Not to mention it's a hell of a good song."

I slowly began to realize that he had calmed me down. "Hey thanks for pounding some sense back into me. I almost bought a permanent stay in the hotel Femme-Fatal."

"Don't mention it, buddy, but now we'd better get over to your dorm room. The sun will be up soon and then it'll be too late."

I produced the bottle of Vodka Kip had given me from behind the plastic bag that contained my clothes from a previous life. Unscrewing the cap, I downed a huge gulp of the oily, warm liquid.

"What's that?"

"Vodka," I rasped hoarsely and coughed "Want some?" I shoved the bottle in his face

He pushed it away. "Nope, I don't like booze. The stuff gives me a headache. I drink beer and wine only. It's better for the system."

"Whatever," I shrugged. I put the cap back on the bottle and made it disappear again, "Let's get going."

By the time we made it the few short blocks to my building, I was feeling the effects of that first blast of vodka. I unscrewed the cap again and downed a bigger swallow. It burned but not nearly as much as the first one. After a few minutes, I was feeling better -- a little light in the head, but better -- so I took one more, smaller drink and recapped the bottle.

Gary glared at me sideways as he watched me down another gulp. "You want to be careful. You're getting drunk Tammy," he warned. "That's probably not a real good idea right now."

"You bet your sweet ass I'm 'getting drunk Tammy,'" I said poking an index finger into his chest. "You would too if you were a Tammy or a Cindy or Nancy or what ever kind of freak I am."

"Ok, but you have to be a little more quiet, we're home." He pointed across the street to the dorm building.

"Oh good. You can carry me across the threshold. Come on, pick me up you brute." I tried to throw my arms around his neck and tried to leap into his arms, but he was too tall and wasn't having any of it. I lost my grip and landed on my ass on the sidewalk.

"OUCH! Hey, you were supposed to catch me," I said getting up and rubbing my bottom.

"Oh man, this is not good," Gary moaned, "Shussshhhh, Mike. Come on, you're going to get us popped man!"

"Ok. Shussshhhh," I whispered, holding one lean, slender finger up to my lips and giggling. "I'm shushing." Gary put one large hand over his forehead in frustration.

After he had relaxed a bit he said, "Go around to the back, where your window is. I'll go in and help you in once I get to your room. Now be quiet, or someone will call the cops.

Again I held one finger up to lips and said, "Shussshhhh."

"Give me your door card," he commanded. I pulled it out and played a quick game of keep-away. The liquor helped me to stay loose enough to keep him from getting the card right away, but he finally managed to get the card by grabbing my arm and holding my hand still.

"Man, drunk women," he grumbled, shaking his head as he walked away, crossing the street.

"Why can't I ever I find any drunk women I want to go to bed with?" he wondered as he walked toward my building.

"I heard that," I called out after him.

I walked across the street and around to the back of the building where the trash compactors were kept. I found my window and waited for Gary to get there. While I waited, I polished off the last three gulps of Vodka. There was enough in me now that I nearly hacked it all back up, but somehow; I managed to keep it down.

I was feeling no pain. Even the rats scuttling around the trash bin didn't concern me. I waited for what seemed like an intolerable amount of time for the light to come on in my room. As I waited, the warmth of vodka in my belly was making its way to my bladder and I needed to get inside and pee. I looked around for an obvious alternative, but of course found none.

Light spilled out of the window behind me and I turned to see Gary opening the large window. He bent out of the window and gestured for me to take his hands. I reached up and his huge hands swallowed mine. One hoist and I was almost in, but a sandaled foot slipped on the smooth stone of the sill and I went crashing against the side of the building.

It might have worked out better if Gary had lost his grip. I would have landed on my already wounded fanny and from what I had seen so far, there seemed to be plenty of padding there to break my fall. Instead, I landed stretched out against the side of the building. I led with my chest, which drove the air out of my lungs in a hurry. It also gave me another lesson on my newfound femininity.

New Girl Lesson #2: The breasts very are sensitive. Avoid crushing them when ever possible.

I couldn't breathe, but what seemed worse was the pain in my breasts; it seemed to wrack my entire system. When I found the strength to open my eyes, the world swam around like some weird hallucination. I had a headache and my shoulders and back hurt. My legs seemed to be tingling with pain. At the time, I remember thinking that getting kicked in the balls might have seemed better.

"Holy shit Mike, are you ok?" I heard panic in his voice. It was thin and far away.

Still, I managed to think to myself, I wonder if he would panic if I were still me. I tried to answer him but all the came out was an almost inaudible squeak.

"Oh God, I've killed her!" Mike cried and suddenly I was being hoisted up without my help. Even with the amount of pain I was feeling, the reference to me as 'her' wasn't lost on me.

My head rose above the sill as he hoisted my dead weight and I could finally see into my room. I clung to the sill for a moment while Gary put his arms around my waist and then he hauled me in. Either I didn't weigh much or the body Gary was in was as strong as a Brahma bull.

He set me down on my bed and again knelt down in front of me. I still couldn't breathe; I was trying to gasp for air but my lungs weren't accepting any deliveries at the moment. My hands were on my chest and throat trying to help but they were at a loss for what to do.

I saw Gary looking at me and decided I must look really bad because he looked scared as hell. That scared me even more and I tried even harder to pull air into my chest. I looked back at him again and nodded no. It wasn't working. I was choking.

"Breathe! Come ON! BREATHE!" he shouted.

And I did. Slowly air started to come back into my body. As it did the pain in my chest came back -- not as intense this time, but it was there -- and I was glad for it. Pain meant I was still alive.

That was the second time that evening I thought I was going to suffocate. The routine was getting just a little old.

"Yeah! Yeah! Breathe baby, breathe! That's it! All right baby, keep it up! Wow I thought I'd lost you there." He had me by the shoulders; we were face to face.

"Gary?" I whispered

"Yeah, what?"

"Don't call me 'baby.'"

"Right. Sure, anything you say. Shit, you're alive."

"And you're not going to jail for murder," I added.

"You betcha!" he shouted. "Damn Right! Whew!"

All I could do was smile. That's my buddy all right.

Ok, I was home again. Albeit on the floor gasping for breath, but I felt that as soon as I could breathe more normally, I could start to relax a bit, so I waited for that time to arrive. Little by little, I began to feel more myself; that is, as much as I could possibly feel myself.

For now we were as safe as we could make ourselves. There were no thoughts of anyone else in our little troupe. All we could think about was getting though the next forty-four or so hours and returning to our normal selves.